Captain America? Hell No!

Well, I know I'm breaking away from movies again so soon but I've been wanting to do this one for some time and since I haven't watched any of my DVD's to carry on my review of 2012 movies, I thought it's about time I write this one up (I will be resuming with movies for the last post of the week, I'll be watching Rock Of Ages tomorrow if all goes according to plan). Today, it's a comic review, for the mini series Ultimate Comics: Captain America

I don't think I've gone over the Ultimate Universe in any posts so a little history: Marvel wanted to bring in new readers without alienating their existing fanbase but with the amount of history their titles have, it was going to be a task. The solution was to create a new universe and create new versions of the characters from the main universe, but setting it so that a majority of the characters got their starts in the present day, thus making it a little more modern. This way they could make new origins and adventures for new readers, whilst leaving the main universe alone (in short, not rebooting the whole thing like DC). Ultimate Spider-Man led the charge and was soon followed by Ultimate X-Men, the Ultimates and Ultimate Fantastic Four, as well as various mini-series in between. In 2009, the massive crossover Ultimatum occurred and this lead to a rebranding of the imprint, now going by Ultimate Comics, with the current titles being The Ultimates, X-Men and Spider-Man.

I haven't read much since the rebranding (or much of it before the rebranding) but I absolutely adore Ultimate Spider-Man and despite its faults, I'll happily defend it.

But today, I'm discussing Jason Aaron's Ultimate Comics: Captain America mini-series, drawn by Ron Garney.

After a botched mission in North Korea, involving someone distributing the super soldier serum Cap goes to Cambodia to locate the man behind the serum plot and ends as his captive, with the man revealing himself to be Frank Simpson, aka the “Captain America of the Vietnam War”. Frank is set on “educating” Cap on America's evils, determined to break him.

I have to say, from what I expected, this comic was a great disappointment to me. Before I get into that, I'm going to give credit where credit's due.

The art in this book is pretty good. The scenery is bright and vibrant and the action scenes look impressive. Really, there isn't much more to say and that's not because the art's not worth mentioning, just that I'm a story and character person, so unless the art is hideous, I tend not to get caught up in it. There is one aspect I don't like, however, and I'll go over that now.

The biggest problem this comic has, and this is a criticism for most of the other books in the Ultimate imprint featuring Cap, is that... well, Cap's a prick.

I'm not expecting all of the alternate universe versions of the “mainstream” universe to be carbon copies, but in one-shot stories or alternate futures where we probably won't see that version again, you're allowed to go nuts and experiment. But the Ultimate books are ongoing, so we're going to see these characters again and again. In that sense, some divergence is fine, but a recurring trend I've noticed in the Ultimate books (particularly The Ultimates line itself) is that most of the characters undergo some sort of “arseholeification” and it's off-putting (Thor may be one of the few who escapes it, though in return, he gets labelled a crazy man who thinks he's the God Of Thunder).

Cap suffers from it the worst, as he's always putting down other nationalities and acting all like “America rocks! Go us, screw non-Americans!”

For example, the North Korean bungle (which has a scene with Cap holding a gun with a weird expression on his face, like he's biting down on something to not feel the pain from a needle), he says “You can't blame me for that mission going to Hell. Blame those incompetent Brit-” before he's cut off. And before the mission goes to crap, there's this little gem: “C'mon, ladies, it's not tea time already is it? Move your asses”. Yes, because the British love tea. Cap, you're not exactly free of stereotype yourself.

Oh but it gets better: after turning down some food in Cambodia, after complaining it “smells like a cesspool”, he pulls the classic “Does anyone speak American?” bit. You're overseas, Cap. Stop acting like a damn ignorant tourist. Maybe spend less time training when not fighting crime and maybe take the time to learn about other cultures, since you'd be traveling a lot. It doesn't matter if they do speak some English (not “American”, you ignorant clod), that would most likely be due to Frank's influence. And some of them wouldn't be entirely fluent.

Going back to the art thing for a minute, I checked the whole book to confirm this and you know what I noticed? He never smiles, except for one time. He's almost always scowling. I'm beginning to think Garney was possessed by Frank Miller or Rob Liefeld when drawing Cap's face. I kept thinking “Am I reading about Captain America or did I pick up The Dark Knight Strikes Again by mistake?” based on Cap's personality and the politics (though, at least the political aspects make more sense here).

And that one time he smiles? You can barely tell he's smiling. Hell, maybe it's the goddamn Punisher under the costume for all I know. Wouldn't be the first time...

What makes it worse is that I actually like the villain more. It's one thing to have a well-written story in which the hero is awesome but the villain is also cool or a magnificent bastard or the like (basically Batman and The Joker), it's another where you agree with the villain more because the hero is poorly written. That's a bad sign, guys. Frank Simpson may be trying to brainwash Cap with propaganda, but he actually mixes in some truth, and he's almost entirely rational. He's a little extreme, granted, but in his mind, his country betrayed him and he wants everyone to share his belief on how his homeland is mired in corruption. He's actually a well-written antagonist and it's worth reading the book just for him.

Last negative point, how does Cap counter Frank's arguments? In basic terms “You suck. America has made mistakes but it's still awesome and you're not. Commie!” That's how I see it, anyway. If this was the Cap of 616 (main Marvel universe), I'd expect something like “The nation has problems. Always has, always will. But we can overcome these problems and redeem ourselves. We can prove we stand for truth, liberty and justice”. Corny, yes, but the Cap of 616 is a man of honour, compassion, wisdom and is pure of heart.

And that's what it all boils down to. One Cap is a champion of the people, defending anyone and everyone who is in need of defending. The other is a self-righteous arsehole who believes the Bible is the undisputed guide to living life, even while holding a gun. I know, I know, different attitudes and all that, especially considering when the Cap of the Ultimate Universe was defrosted, but if he's meant to represent the American ideal or way of life... that means the Ultimate Universe is filled with bigger arseholes than the 616! And that's no mean feat! And Cap is widely different from them. But Ultimate Cap? Piss off. He'd better improve for future stories.

Well, that about wraps it up. I will say there was a cool scene involving Cap and snake venom, but besides that, the art and Frank, there's not much to go on. Disappointing, especially since it's Captain America.